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A man speaks frantically on phone, "My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart!"
"Is this her first child?" the doctor queries.
"No, you idiot!" the man shouts. "This is her husband!"
"Is this her first child?" the doctor queries.
"No, you idiot!" the man shouts. "This is her husband!"
A young boy asks his dad: "What's the difference between theorectically and realistically?"
"Well son, go and ask your mother if she would sleep with the postman for $1million ..."
The little boy asks his mum and then goes back to his dad: "She said yes ..."
"Now go and ask your sister if she would sleep with the milkman for $2million ..."
The little boy asks his sister: "She said yes, but whats the difference between theoretically and realistically?"
"Well son, theorectically we are sitting on $3million ... realistically we are living with a couple of slags!"
"Well son, go and ask your mother if she would sleep with the postman for $1million ..."
The little boy asks his mum and then goes back to his dad: "She said yes ..."
"Now go and ask your sister if she would sleep with the milkman for $2million ..."
The little boy asks his sister: "She said yes, but whats the difference between theoretically and realistically?"
"Well son, theorectically we are sitting on $3million ... realistically we are living with a couple of slags!"
What's the difference between Princess Diana and Casper the ghost?
Casper can go through walls.
Casper can go through walls.
George W. Bush was getting off of Airforce One in Israel, when he walked passed Moses, who didn't seem to notice him.
He turned to Moses and said: "I am George W. Bush, the President of the USA, the most powerful nation on earth. Why didn't you greet me?"
Moses replied: "The last time I spoke to a bush, we starved for 40 years!"
He turned to Moses and said: "I am George W. Bush, the President of the USA, the most powerful nation on earth. Why didn't you greet me?"
Moses replied: "The last time I spoke to a bush, we starved for 40 years!"
I was recently riding with a friend of mine.
We were coming to a red light, and he shoots right through it. I ask him, "Why'd you do that?" He tells me this is how his brother drives.
We come to another red light, and again, he shoots right through it. I ask him, "Why'd you do that?" Again, he tells me this is how his brother drives.
We come to a green light, and he SLAMS on the brakes. My heart nearly goes into my throat. I shouted at him, "Why do you do that?!"
He replied, "You never know, my brother could be coming the other way."
We were coming to a red light, and he shoots right through it. I ask him, "Why'd you do that?" He tells me this is how his brother drives.
We come to another red light, and again, he shoots right through it. I ask him, "Why'd you do that?" Again, he tells me this is how his brother drives.
We come to a green light, and he SLAMS on the brakes. My heart nearly goes into my throat. I shouted at him, "Why do you do that?!"
He replied, "You never know, my brother could be coming the other way."
What's the difference between a man and a messy room?
You can straighten up a messy room.
You can straighten up a messy room.
A police officer sees a man driving around with a pickup truck full of penguins. He pulls the guy over and says: "You can't drive around with penguins in this town! Take them to the zoo immediately."
The guy says OK, and drives away.
The next day, the officer sees the guy still driving around with the truck full of penguins, and they're all wearing sun glasses. He pulls the guy over and demands: "I thought I told you to take these penguins to the zoo yesterday?"
The guy replies: "I did ... today I'm taking them to the beach!"
The guy says OK, and drives away.
The next day, the officer sees the guy still driving around with the truck full of penguins, and they're all wearing sun glasses. He pulls the guy over and demands: "I thought I told you to take these penguins to the zoo yesterday?"
The guy replies: "I did ... today I'm taking them to the beach!"
Yo momma is so poor, she can't even afford to pay attention.
Which branch of the military do babies join?
The infantry!
The infantry!
Math problems? Call 1-800-[(10x)(13i)^2]-[sin(xy)/2.362x].
Teacher: Susie, make a sentence starting with the letter 'I'.
Susie: "I is ..."
Teacher: "No, no, no, don't say 'I is', you say 'I am'".
Susie: "OK, I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
Susie: "I is ..."
Teacher: "No, no, no, don't say 'I is', you say 'I am'".
Susie: "OK, I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
One sperm says to the other: "How far is it to the ovaries?"
The other one replies: "Relax. We just passed the tonsils."
The other one replies: "Relax. We just passed the tonsils."
What's the difference between a man and Bigfoot?
One is covered with matted hair and smells awful. The other has big feet.
One is covered with matted hair and smells awful. The other has big feet.
Why did Michael Jackson call "Boys to Men"?
He thought it was a delivery service.
He thought it was a delivery service.
There was a little boy named Johnny who used to hang out at the local corner market. The owner didn't know what Johnny's problem was, but the boys would constantly tease him. They would always comment that he was two bricks shy of a load, or two pickles short of a barrel. To prove it, sometimes they would offer Johnny his choice between a nickel (5 cents) and a dime (10 cents) and John would always take the nickel ... they said, because it was bigger.
One day after Little Johnny grabbed the nickel, the store owner took him aside and said "Johnny, those boys are making fun of you. They think you don't know the dime is worth more than the nickel. Are you grabbing the nickel because it's bigger, or what?"
Slowly, Little Johnny turned toward the store owner and a big grin appeared on his face and he said, "Well, if I took the dime, they'd stop doing it, and so far I have saved $20!"
One day after Little Johnny grabbed the nickel, the store owner took him aside and said "Johnny, those boys are making fun of you. They think you don't know the dime is worth more than the nickel. Are you grabbing the nickel because it's bigger, or what?"
Slowly, Little Johnny turned toward the store owner and a big grin appeared on his face and he said, "Well, if I took the dime, they'd stop doing it, and so far I have saved $20!"
Teacher: "Who succeeded the first President of the USA?"
Pupil: "The second one!"
Pupil: "The second one!"
Why don't violists play hide and seek?
Because no one will look for them.
Because no one will look for them.
Yo momma is so dirty, that she was banned from a sewage facility because of sanitation worries!
A woman is in kichen preparing dinner for her husband.
She askes: "Honey what's on tv?"
Husband replies: "Dust honey!"
She askes: "Honey what's on tv?"
Husband replies: "Dust honey!"
Many years ago when I was 23, I got married to a widow. This widow had a grown up daughter.
My father fell in love with her, and soon they got married too.
This made my Dad my son-in-law and changed my very life.
My daughter was my mother too because she was my father's wife!
After a few years I bacame father of a baby boy complicating the matter further. My son became the brother-in-law of my father!
My father fell in love with her, and soon they got married too.
This made my Dad my son-in-law and changed my very life.
My daughter was my mother too because she was my father's wife!
After a few years I bacame father of a baby boy complicating the matter further. My son became the brother-in-law of my father!
Two men Lory and Dwart are chatting as they work.
Lory says: "I've been attending night classes for 5 months now and I have an exam next week."
Dwart: "Ooh!"
Lory: "For example, do you know who is Graham Bell?"
Dwart: "No."
Lory: "He's the inventor of the phone in 1876. If you take night courses you would know this."
The next day, the same discussion took place.
Dwart: "Do you know who Alexander Dumas is?"
Lory: "No."
Dwart: "He's the author of 'The 3 Musketeers'! If you take night courses, you would know this."
The next day, once again:
Lory: "And do you know who Jean Jacques Rousseau is?"
Dwart: "No"
Lory: "He's the author of 'Confessions', if you take night courses, you would know this."
This time, Narayan got irritated and said: "And you, do you know who is Balakrishnan Kuppuswamy?"
Dwart: "No"
Lory: "He's the guy roaming with your wife! If you stop night courses, you would know!"
Lory says: "I've been attending night classes for 5 months now and I have an exam next week."
Dwart: "Ooh!"
Lory: "For example, do you know who is Graham Bell?"
Dwart: "No."
Lory: "He's the inventor of the phone in 1876. If you take night courses you would know this."
The next day, the same discussion took place.
Dwart: "Do you know who Alexander Dumas is?"
Lory: "No."
Dwart: "He's the author of 'The 3 Musketeers'! If you take night courses, you would know this."
The next day, once again:
Lory: "And do you know who Jean Jacques Rousseau is?"
Dwart: "No"
Lory: "He's the author of 'Confessions', if you take night courses, you would know this."
This time, Narayan got irritated and said: "And you, do you know who is Balakrishnan Kuppuswamy?"
Dwart: "No"
Lory: "He's the guy roaming with your wife! If you stop night courses, you would know!"
"Mommy, Mommy, are you sure this is how to learn to swim?"
"Shut up and get back in the sack!"
"Shut up and get back in the sack!"
So there were these two cows, chatting over the fence between their fields.
The first cow said,"I tell you, this mad-cow-disease is really pretty scary. They say it is spreading fast; I heard it hit some cows down on the Johnson Farm."
The other cow replies, "Hell, I ain't worried, it don't affect us ducks."
The first cow said,"I tell you, this mad-cow-disease is really pretty scary. They say it is spreading fast; I heard it hit some cows down on the Johnson Farm."
The other cow replies, "Hell, I ain't worried, it don't affect us ducks."
Why can't a bike stand up for itself?
Because it's two tired.
Because it's two tired.
Yo momma is so fat. Even Bill Gates couldn't pay for her liposuction.
Bill Gates met God, and God said, "Well, Bill, I'm really confused on this one. I'm not sure whether to send you to Heaven or to Hell. After all, you enormously helped society by putting a computer in almost every home in the world, and yet you created that ghastly Windows. I'm going to do something I've never done before. I'm going to let you decide where you want to go."
Bill Gates said, "What's the difference between the two?"
God said, "It might help you decide if you took a peek at both places. Shall we look at Hell first?"
Bill was amazed. He saw a clean, white sandy beach with clear waters. There were thousands of beautiful men and women running around, playing in the water, laughing and frolicking about. The sun was shining and the temperature was perfect. "This is great!" said Bill. "If this is Hell, I can't wait to see Heaven."
God said, "Let's go!" and off they went to Heaven.
Bill saw puffy white clouds in a beautiful blue sky, with angels drifting about playing harps and singing. It was nice, but surely not as enticing as Hell. Bill thought for only a brief moment and rendered his decision. "God, I do believe I would prefer to go to Hell."
"As you wish," said God.
Two weeks later, God decided to check up on the late billionaire to see how things were going. He found Bill shackled to a wall, screaming amidst the hot flames in a dark cave. He was being tortured by demons with pitchforks. "How ya doin', Bill?" asked God.
Bill responded with anguish and despair, "This is awful! This is not what I expected at all! What happened to the beach and the beautiful women playing in the water?"
"Oh, that," said God. "That was the screen saver."
Bill Gates said, "What's the difference between the two?"
God said, "It might help you decide if you took a peek at both places. Shall we look at Hell first?"
Bill was amazed. He saw a clean, white sandy beach with clear waters. There were thousands of beautiful men and women running around, playing in the water, laughing and frolicking about. The sun was shining and the temperature was perfect. "This is great!" said Bill. "If this is Hell, I can't wait to see Heaven."
God said, "Let's go!" and off they went to Heaven.
Bill saw puffy white clouds in a beautiful blue sky, with angels drifting about playing harps and singing. It was nice, but surely not as enticing as Hell. Bill thought for only a brief moment and rendered his decision. "God, I do believe I would prefer to go to Hell."
"As you wish," said God.
Two weeks later, God decided to check up on the late billionaire to see how things were going. He found Bill shackled to a wall, screaming amidst the hot flames in a dark cave. He was being tortured by demons with pitchforks. "How ya doin', Bill?" asked God.
Bill responded with anguish and despair, "This is awful! This is not what I expected at all! What happened to the beach and the beautiful women playing in the water?"
"Oh, that," said God. "That was the screen saver."
A woman gives birth to a baby and afterward the doctor comes into the room and says, "I have something to tell you about your child ..."
The woman slowly sits up with a worried look on her face and says, "What's wrong with it?"
The doctor says, "There's nothing really wrong with it, it's just a little different! It's a hermaphrodite."
The woman looks confused. "A hermaphrodite, what's that?"
The doctor replies, "It has both features of a male and a female."
The woman looks relieved. "What? You mean it has a penis and a brain?"
The woman slowly sits up with a worried look on her face and says, "What's wrong with it?"
The doctor says, "There's nothing really wrong with it, it's just a little different! It's a hermaphrodite."
The woman looks confused. "A hermaphrodite, what's that?"
The doctor replies, "It has both features of a male and a female."
The woman looks relieved. "What? You mean it has a penis and a brain?"
Yo momma is so fat she don't have to go on the internet, she is already world wide!
What is the difference between God and a social worker?
God doesn't pretend to be a social worker.
God doesn't pretend to be a social worker.
A guy and a nun go golfing. The guy hits his ball into the water. He says "Damn! I missed!" The nun replies "Don't swear. God can hear you." So the guy is like "Whatever".
He hits the ball again. It goes into the trees. "Damn! I missed!" "Don't swear, God can hear you!" "Whatever"
So, he hits his ball once again, but it only goes about 4 yards. "AARRRGH!!!! SHIT!!!!"
Ok, so about now, God gets mad. He throws down a thunderbolt. It hits the nun.
"Damn! I missed!"
He hits the ball again. It goes into the trees. "Damn! I missed!" "Don't swear, God can hear you!" "Whatever"
So, he hits his ball once again, but it only goes about 4 yards. "AARRRGH!!!! SHIT!!!!"
Ok, so about now, God gets mad. He throws down a thunderbolt. It hits the nun.
"Damn! I missed!"
A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license.
She replies in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you!"
She replies in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you!"
The Pope met with the College of Cardinals to discuss a proposal from Shimon Peres, the former leader of Israel.
"Your holiness," said one of the Cardinals, "Mr. Peres wants to determine whether Jews or Catholics are superior, by challenging you to a golf match."
The Pope was greatly disturbed, as he had never held a golf club in his life.
"Not to worry," said the Cardinal, "We'll call America and talk to Jack Nicklaus. We'll make him a Cardinal, he can play Shimon Peres ... We can't lose!"
Everyone agreed it was a good idea. The call was made and, of course, Jack was honored and agreed to play.
The day after the match, Nicklaus reported to the Vatican to inform the Pope of his success in the match. "I came in second, your Holiness," said Nicklaus.
"Second?!" exclaimed the surprised Pope. "You came in second to Shimon Peres?!"
"No," said Nicklaus, "second to Rabbi Woods."
"Your holiness," said one of the Cardinals, "Mr. Peres wants to determine whether Jews or Catholics are superior, by challenging you to a golf match."
The Pope was greatly disturbed, as he had never held a golf club in his life.
"Not to worry," said the Cardinal, "We'll call America and talk to Jack Nicklaus. We'll make him a Cardinal, he can play Shimon Peres ... We can't lose!"
Everyone agreed it was a good idea. The call was made and, of course, Jack was honored and agreed to play.
The day after the match, Nicklaus reported to the Vatican to inform the Pope of his success in the match. "I came in second, your Holiness," said Nicklaus.
"Second?!" exclaimed the surprised Pope. "You came in second to Shimon Peres?!"
"No," said Nicklaus, "second to Rabbi Woods."
A lecturer teaching medicine was giving a classoom observation. He took out a jar of yellow liquid. "This," he explained, "is urine. To be a doctor, you have to be observant of color, smell, sight, and taste."
After saying so, he dipped his finger into the jar and put it into his mouth. His class watched in amazement, most in disgust. But being the good students that they were, the jar was passed, and one by one, they dipped their finger into the jar and put it into their mouths.
After the last student was done, the lecturer shook his head. "If any of you had been observant, you would have noticed that I put my second finger into the jar and my third finger into my mouth."
After saying so, he dipped his finger into the jar and put it into his mouth. His class watched in amazement, most in disgust. But being the good students that they were, the jar was passed, and one by one, they dipped their finger into the jar and put it into their mouths.
After the last student was done, the lecturer shook his head. "If any of you had been observant, you would have noticed that I put my second finger into the jar and my third finger into my mouth."
One Sunday afternoon, a guy walks into a bar with his pet dog. The bartender said, "Sorry, pal. No pets allowed."
The man replied, "This is a special dog. Turn on the Jets game and you'll see."
The bartender, anxious to see what will happen, turned on the game.
The guy said, "Watch. Whenever the Jets score, my dog does flips." The Jets keep scoring field goals and the dog keeps flipping and jumping.
"Wow! That's one hell of a dog you got there. What happens when the Jets score a touchdown?" asked the bartender.
The man replied, "I don't know. I've only had him for seven years."
The man replied, "This is a special dog. Turn on the Jets game and you'll see."
The bartender, anxious to see what will happen, turned on the game.
The guy said, "Watch. Whenever the Jets score, my dog does flips." The Jets keep scoring field goals and the dog keeps flipping and jumping.
"Wow! That's one hell of a dog you got there. What happens when the Jets score a touchdown?" asked the bartender.
The man replied, "I don't know. I've only had him for seven years."
At an army training camp in Florida, the Seargent is giving a talk: "The main quality we look for in this army is commitment and this is what I call commitment." An alligator came in the room and bit the seargents penis. It stayed there for about a 10 seconds then the seargent poked it in the eyes and kicked it off.
"Now who's ready to show their commitment?" said the Seargent. A man put his hand up and said "I will, but promise you won't poke me in the eyes."
"Now who's ready to show their commitment?" said the Seargent. A man put his hand up and said "I will, but promise you won't poke me in the eyes."
Yo momma is so gassy, she started global warming!
What is the difference between a wife and a girlfriend?
About 45 pounds.
What's the differece between a husband and a boyfriend?
45 minutes.
About 45 pounds.
What's the differece between a husband and a boyfriend?
45 minutes.
A man says to his wife: "Tell me something that will make me both happy and sad at the same time."
His wife replies: "You have a bigger willy than your brother!"
His wife replies: "You have a bigger willy than your brother!"
Once upon a time, a beautiful princess happened upon a frog in a pond.
The frog said to the princess, "I was once a handsome prince until an evil witch put a spell on me. One kiss from you and I will turn back into a prince and then we can marry, move into the castle with my mom where you can prepare my meals, clean my clothes, bear my children and forever feel lucky for doing so."
That night the princess had frog legs for dinner.
The frog said to the princess, "I was once a handsome prince until an evil witch put a spell on me. One kiss from you and I will turn back into a prince and then we can marry, move into the castle with my mom where you can prepare my meals, clean my clothes, bear my children and forever feel lucky for doing so."
That night the princess had frog legs for dinner.
Why did President Truman drop the first atomic bomb?
Because he thought it would be more humane than sending in Chuck Norris.
Because he thought it would be more humane than sending in Chuck Norris.
"Doc, you've gotta help me. My wife just isn't interested in sex anymore. Haven't you got a pill or something I can give her?"
"Look, I can't prescribe ..."
"Doc, we've been friends for years. Have you ever seen me this upset? I am desperate! I can't think; I can't concentrate; my life is going utterly to Hell! You've got to help me."
The doctor opens his desk drawer and removes a small bottle of pills. "Ordinarily, I wouldn't do this. These are experimental, the tests so far indicate that they're VERY powerful. Don't give her more than ONE, understand? JUST one."
"I don't know, doc; she's awfully cold ..."
"One. No more. In her coffee. Okay?"
"Um ... okay."
Our hero expresses gratitude, and departs for home, where his wife has dinner waiting. When dinner is finished, she goes to the kitchen to bring dessert. Our hero, in fumbling haste, pulls the pills from his pocket and drops one into his wife's coffee. He reflects for a moment, hesitates, then drops in a second pill. And then he begins to worry. The doctor did say they were powerful. Then an inspiration strikes: he drops one pill into his own coffee.
His wife returns with the shortcake, and they enjoy their dessert and coffee, our hero with poorly concealed anticipation. Sure enough, a few minutes after they finish, his wife shudders a little, sighs deeply and heavily, and a strange smoky look enters her eyes. In a deep, throaty, near-whisper, in a tone of voice he has never heard her use before, she says, "I ... need ... a man ..."
His eyes glitter and his hands tremble as he replies, "Me ... too ..."
"Look, I can't prescribe ..."
"Doc, we've been friends for years. Have you ever seen me this upset? I am desperate! I can't think; I can't concentrate; my life is going utterly to Hell! You've got to help me."
The doctor opens his desk drawer and removes a small bottle of pills. "Ordinarily, I wouldn't do this. These are experimental, the tests so far indicate that they're VERY powerful. Don't give her more than ONE, understand? JUST one."
"I don't know, doc; she's awfully cold ..."
"One. No more. In her coffee. Okay?"
"Um ... okay."
Our hero expresses gratitude, and departs for home, where his wife has dinner waiting. When dinner is finished, she goes to the kitchen to bring dessert. Our hero, in fumbling haste, pulls the pills from his pocket and drops one into his wife's coffee. He reflects for a moment, hesitates, then drops in a second pill. And then he begins to worry. The doctor did say they were powerful. Then an inspiration strikes: he drops one pill into his own coffee.
His wife returns with the shortcake, and they enjoy their dessert and coffee, our hero with poorly concealed anticipation. Sure enough, a few minutes after they finish, his wife shudders a little, sighs deeply and heavily, and a strange smoky look enters her eyes. In a deep, throaty, near-whisper, in a tone of voice he has never heard her use before, she says, "I ... need ... a man ..."
His eyes glitter and his hands tremble as he replies, "Me ... too ..."
Pupil: "I don't think I deserved the 0 % you gave me for that test."
Teacher: "Neither do I but its the lowest I could give!"
Teacher: "Neither do I but its the lowest I could give!"
Attending a wedding for the first time, Little Susie whispered to her mother, "Why is the bride dressed in white?"
"Because white is the color of happiness, and today is the happiest day of her life."
Little Susie thought about this for a moment, then said "So why is the groom wearing black?"
"Because white is the color of happiness, and today is the happiest day of her life."
Little Susie thought about this for a moment, then said "So why is the groom wearing black?"
Mom took Little Johnny to the doctor for lacerations on his penis.
Doctor: "How did such a thing happen?"
Johnny: "It's that damn neighbor girl, Susie. Her braces are too darned sharp."
Doctor: "How did such a thing happen?"
Johnny: "It's that damn neighbor girl, Susie. Her braces are too darned sharp."
There were three babies in a woman's womb, and they were discussing what they would like to be when they were out in the world and grown up.
The first one said "I wanna be a plumber." The others laughed at this, and asked why he wanted be be a plumber. He replied, "So I can fix the pipes in here, it's kinda leaky."
The second one said "I wanna be an electrician." The others thought this was kind of silly too and asked why. The second baby answered, "So I can get some lights in here, its dark!"
The third one said, "I wanna be a boxer." The others thought this was hilarious, and laughed for a full five minutes, before asking, "Why in God's name do you want to be a boxer?"
He replied, "So," he said proudly, "I can beat the hell out of that bald guy who keeps coming in here and spitting on us.
The first one said "I wanna be a plumber." The others laughed at this, and asked why he wanted be be a plumber. He replied, "So I can fix the pipes in here, it's kinda leaky."
The second one said "I wanna be an electrician." The others thought this was kind of silly too and asked why. The second baby answered, "So I can get some lights in here, its dark!"
The third one said, "I wanna be a boxer." The others thought this was hilarious, and laughed for a full five minutes, before asking, "Why in God's name do you want to be a boxer?"
He replied, "So," he said proudly, "I can beat the hell out of that bald guy who keeps coming in here and spitting on us.
This sex researcher phones one of the participants in a recent survey of his to check on a discrepancy. He asks the bloke, "In response to the question on frequency of intercourse you answered 'twice weekly'. Your wife, on the other hand, answered 'several times a night'."
"That's right," replies the bloke, "And that's how it's going to stay until our second mortgage is paid off."
"That's right," replies the bloke, "And that's how it's going to stay until our second mortgage is paid off."
What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you?
Run like hell ... she's got a hand grenade in her mouth.
Run like hell ... she's got a hand grenade in her mouth.
Yo momma is so old.
She sat behind jesus in the third grade.
She sat behind jesus in the third grade.
3 little ducks go into a bar. "What's your name the barman asks the first duck?" "Huey" was the reply. "Hows your day been Huey?" "Great, I've been in and out of puddles all day ... what more could a duck want?"
"What's your name he asked the 2nd duck?" "Dewey" was the reply "... and I've been in and out of puddles all day as well."
He turned to the 3rd duck and said: "I suppose your Louie ...?" "No she said batting her eyelids ... my name is puddles!"
"What's your name he asked the 2nd duck?" "Dewey" was the reply "... and I've been in and out of puddles all day as well."
He turned to the 3rd duck and said: "I suppose your Louie ...?" "No she said batting her eyelids ... my name is puddles!"
Two blondes were in a bar watching the television when the news came on. It showed a guy on a bridge that was about to jump, obviously suicidal. "I'll bet you $10 he'll jump," said Betty.
"Bet you $10 he won't," replied Amber. Then, the guy on the television closed his eyes and threw himself off the bridge. The second blonde hands the first her money.
"I can't take your money," said Betty. "I cheated you. The same story was on the five o'clock news."
"No, no. Take it," said Amber. "I saw the five o'clock news too. I just didn't think the guy was dumb enough to jump again!"
"Bet you $10 he won't," replied Amber. Then, the guy on the television closed his eyes and threw himself off the bridge. The second blonde hands the first her money.
"I can't take your money," said Betty. "I cheated you. The same story was on the five o'clock news."
"No, no. Take it," said Amber. "I saw the five o'clock news too. I just didn't think the guy was dumb enough to jump again!"